spongebob squarepants.

recently i stumbled upon a "study" that made me think. it seems that watching sponge bob for just 9 minutes makes you dumber. there are hundreds of "studies" going on all the time. among the findings of such important "studies" are as follows: too many carrots can make your skin turn orange (anyone whose fed a 5 month old his first bottle of carrots can tell you that) but carrots also single handedly improve eye sight. to much vinegar from pickles can cause cancer, ( as does using dark brown hair dye vs. blond hair dye) but eating pickles as a snack reduces caloric intake and everyone knows brunettes have more fun. these "studies" it seems are endless in their scope and schizophrenic in their results. oh and viagra can also raise the dead. (ha ha i made that one up)
i've watched sponge bob many times with my kids. my favorite is the one where sponge bob relishes in the sound of pickles being rubbed together. squeaky squeak. or the one where spongebob runs into a girl that looks just like him and mr. crabs says "who is that?" and sponge bob says, " i don't know but she is UGGlyyyy!" it's one of those shows you watch and when it's over you think about it and chuckle and then you tell your friend the funny parts and laugh again. it stays on the brain. the phenomenon of thinking about movies or tv long after the credits roll is not a new one to me. all i could focus on for days after seeing "pride and predjudice" (kiera knightly version) was how to get mike to walk towards me at sunrise in some riding boots. or after i watch the last episode of "lost" i wondered how something so mysterious and wonderful could turn into such a big blah cliche.
i am disturbed by natl geographics "border wars" (how do we help the immigrants who work hard and at the same time, keep those cartel bums out?) i am mesmerized by the creative powers on "project runway" and "top chef" (can you really make pork belly and chocolate into a delicious entree) and i still can't wait to see what jim does to dwight every thursday night on "the office"
so i totally get how the scientists could come to the conclusion that spongebob makes you dumber. what kid is going to focus on math when hilarious undersea hijinks are on the brain? i think a more accurate study would also deduce that the dumbing down is not incremental or permanent. which i think means you are not actually dumber, just other wise engaged. and probably much more optimistic. (one day mike will wear riding boots at dawn)
i wonder what the process is for these scientists to come up with new "studies". maybe they were watching reruns of "pysch" and got a little distracted when they thought up the all important spongebob "study."